Lincoln Marshall Johnston
22nd October 2008
32 weeks 6 days
Although I cannot hold you in my arms I will always hold you in my
heart.
Today I planted some spinach, silver beet and marigolds in the garden with Isaac.
Today I read "Puppy Takes a Holiday" with Cohen neatly curled up on my lap.
5 years ago today I gave birth to my baby boy Lincoln.
5 years ago today I held him knowing I would never hear him cry or laugh or see him grow. That I would never hold him again.
5 years ago today my heart broke and I thought it could be fixed.
Today I remembered that pain, I could feel the ache in my heart and I gasped for air as I did then.
Today I cried.
Today that pain didn't stay like it once did.
Today I laughed and ate cake with my boys.
Today I got cranky about the mess on the floor.
Today I cleaned up spilt milk and vacuumed toast crumbs
Today we flew paper plans that Luke had made.
Today, and every day since the safe arrival of Isaac, my heart swelled
Oh Mama, my heart breaks for you. xx
ReplyDeleteSimply gorgeous post Kate... Thinking of you... xx
ReplyDeleteThankyou Jodie
DeleteSo beautifully and elegantly written. Although i am sure your heart heart can't be "fixed," I hope it is healing today and everyday.
ReplyDeleteThankyou so much Rachel, most days are good but his birthday is always the hardest.
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